We've had it all this week. Sick kid. Bad grade. Friend drama. Sports drama. And now the weatherman is predicting snow in May. Can I fold my cards? Can I throw in the towel?
So much of what has happened in our house this week has been beyond my control. So much of it has left me feeling completely inadequate as a mother. I'm in the middle of a big freelance project, and I just picked up a new one, which means learning a new style and a new system. I've been tired, crabby and overwhelmed.
Unfortunately this is the week my girls needed more from me than typical mom stuff. They needed someone wise. They needed someone with extra compassion to offer. They needed someone patient.
What they got was a mother who internally rolled her eyes at yet another moment of drama. What they got was mother who groaned when the school nurse called to tell her to come pick up her sick kid. What they got was a mother who sat in her chair and shed tears over her inability to figure out how to help the child who was struggling to understand her math. What they got was so much less than they deserved.
We all have days or weeks like this. We all have moments when we know we could have done so much better. None of us are perfect -- not even that mom who looks like she has it all together. We all have moments when we look to the heavens and cry out "What am I supposed to do?"
And it's OK. We're not going to get it right 100 percent of the time. We're going to make mistakes. We're going to have days and weeks when we give our kids less than they deserve. We're going to have moments when we want to throw in the towel and turn in our mommy card.
Yet, I think it is in those moments that God works the most. It's the moments when we are the weakest that He is able to show up and be strong. In the moments when we have no idea what to do, God can show us His strength and His power. God is closer in the moments when we are driven to our knees because of our own inadequacies. 2 Corinthians 12:9 says "But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me." It's in our moments of failure that God triumphs.
And that's when our kids see God in us. They see Him when we admit our failures. They see Him when we tell them we don't have all the answers but we trust that God has a plan. They see Him when they see us on our knees, our heads bent over His word.
So, when you feel inadequate, when you don't know what to do, when you want to fold the hand you've been dealt, remember that God's power is made perfect in your weakness. For our kids to see God, we sometimes have to be weak. We sometimes have to fail. But when we do, God is there.